January 20, 2017

Dear Baby,

I think that one of the more surprising things about you is that in spite of your fearless determination and headstrong personality, you have a serious startle response and scare impulse that is slightly bewildering to see. I think you have had a big startle reflex from birth which, at the time of you being a newborn was just adorable. We use to just pick you up and put you down to watch you splay your arms and legs and laugh when your eyes bugged out of your head for every noise made.

They say it is good to have a baby who is exposed to loud noise which for us never mattered because every noise seemed to be a loud noise to you so there you go…

Anyways, flash forward to actually getting control of your reflexes and you still scare at really funny things. We can put you down without your body flinging itself and you can now sleep right through your dog barking at the mystery thing in the window (which, come to think about it scares me) but certain items elicit a reaction from you that we can’t help but laugh at behind your back.

Sorry.

Hopefully you will also find this funny one day.

So, in no particular order here are the things that freak you out:

1. This gorgeous hand made felt puppet that looks like a funny human/muppet. Literally, we cannot say the word “puppet” without making you cry. Mind you, you have no problem playing with the fucking creepy ass marionette toy that looks like it will come alive and murder people in their sleep but the funny, adorable puppet is now safely stashed way out of your toy chest (because even having it in the toy chest scared you.)
2. Any toy made of rubber that blows air. You know those like, bath toys that have a tiny air hole to make sure water can get out so that they float? Well, you like those toys- a lot- UNLESS we use it to spray you with air or water. Turns out that you do not like having a gust of air blown at you and you forever reject poor starfish toy for doing it one too many times. Whoops.
3. Bubble bath. Who knew? I have never met a kid so obsessed with bubbles and you like the bath so we figured combining the two would be your dream scenario. You peed on the floor the first time you saw a bubble bath with tears streaming down your cheeks. It was, coincidentally, also the last time for a bubble bath.
4. Giant plush toys with eyes- except for the fucking life sized giraffe you have in your room that you kiss every night (although refuse to sit on despite my dreams of a photo op.)
5. Dogs- the smaller, the scarier. Most people would be timid around your 65 pound black dog with hidden eyes but you seem to fear a 6 pound toy poodle the most. When we FaceTime your cousin and that little dog barks, it’s time to hang up. You ran over to pet a husky in a mall last weekend but those 6 pounds of poofiness really do it for you.
6. Bugs. Is it genetic? I swore to not be creeped out by bugs around you so that you don’t grow up a fucking nut job like I am who runs at the speed of light at the suggestion of a bee but we saw an ant in the house (which, also is so fucking weird because it’s the middle of winter so where are you coming from, ant?) and you were really terrified. I even got close down to point out the ant and try and make it a fun learning for you but you were having none of it. Sorry if that is something you inherited from me. It’s so weird and annoying. Good luck at camp.

Baby, you are full of interesting and surprising features. You always think that your baby will be all your and your partner but there you go having this whole part of you that is just… well… you.

I guess a lesson could be learned here so let’s get to it. Fears are ok, normal and totally a part of who we all are but it is also cool that you can always try to overcome them- like obstacles in your life. I truly hope that you are not a puppet and bath toy fearing, bubble bath averse, bug-a-phobic by the time you read this but it is likely you will be afraid of something and all you can ever do is keep trying to face your fears and show them that you are boss. Except wasps- those things will fuck you up for no good reason. Kidding. Not kidding.

xo

Mom