January 17, 2016
So I did this thing last week where I signed up for a class for you and I where I know no one. I don’t usually do stuff like that mostly because we have had such a rich social life with friends of mine and new friends of yours all year. But as the year passes, there are only a handful of people left who did not go back to full time work and none of them live within walking distance from us- which is kind of a bummer on shitty afternoons when I don’t feel like driving but still feel like being social.
So, a friend in my book club who does live in the hood mentioned this class and I signed up. It is even a bit weirder of a thing for me to do because it is actually at someone’s house who I also don’t know but anyways…
The thing about not going back to full time work and not signing your kid up for full time daycare is that there are very few people that seem to be in the same situation. The idea of being lonely in this experience is not for me- thus my unusually friendly gesture…
Anyways. Class was as weird as I expected. I don’t think I really get nervous to meet new people anymore but I did feel like a huge fucking dork when the music teacher called us out in front of everyone to be all like “Do you know anyone in the class” so I could mumble no while hanging my head in embarrassment.
But also in the end, everyone was friendly, I met a bunch of other moms who also don’t have traditional 9-5 jobs or are around in the afternoons and you had the best time of all- which is really the reason I do anything these days.
And my point is this: sure, I will be the first to admit that I felt like a pretty big loser going into that class. Putting yourself out there is really hard and weird and scary BUT there is really nothing that weird about it at all. If the situation was reversed and some new chick came to one of my classes, I would think it was great. Plus, who really gives a shit? Ultimately, this will end with something gained- or not.
Baby, I want you to always put yourself out there if you want to. Don’t be scared what people will think- people don’t tend to care that much about anyone. It is a totally valuable lesson to be uncomfortable and to be vulnerable. Both stem growth.
Plus, it’s hard to be super awkward when you are singing the Hokey Pokey- amiright?